Deep breathing can regulate our nervous systems and help us calm down. Here’s a simple breathing prompt that was shown to effectively teach kids to slow breathe. You don’t have to be a child for this to work for you, too!
Want to calm down or help your kids calm down in just one minute? This breathing practice is for you! It uses a simple, easy breathing prompt that was shown to be an evidence-based way to help kids calm down.
Research On This Breathing Prompt
In 2021, researchers at Stanford published some very promising data. In this study, they were able to teach children to self-regulate their nervous system with deep breathing.
Children were recruited to participate in a natural setting, such as playgrounds and museums. They were showed a quick animated video to guide them through four deep breaths.
In the video, the children were taught to, “smell the flower, and blow out the candle” as a prompt, or visualization, that could help them take slow, deep breaths. Visualizations can be really helpful in guiding our breath while giving our mind something to focus on.
My Experience Using A Similar Breathing Prompt With My Son
I was first exposed to a similar breathing prompt for kids when one of my boys was in developmental preschool. Some of you may remember Victor was a micro preemie and needed to do some catching up before starting kindergarten. This is when he was first exposed to using visualization to guide slow breathing.
It’s not uncommon for children in developmental preschool to need some additional help with self-regulation when their nervous systems get overstimulated. I loved that his entire class was taught to take deep breaths, among other things.
The way his teacher, Miss Judy, taught her kids to engage slow breathing was using the prompt, “smell the cookies, and blow out the candles.” The class would slowly inhale and pretend they smelled fresh baked cookies. They couldn’t help but smile and delight in such a wonderful visualization. Then, they would slowly exhale as if blowing out every last candle on a big birthday cake.
I first published an article on this topic here.
Breathing Prompt to Help Your Kid (And You!) Calm Down
First, let’s practice the breathing prompt used in the study.
- Close your eyes.
- Imagine a beautiful flower in front of you, just under your nose.
- Slowly inhale as if you’re savoring the scent of this fragrant flower.
- Pause.
- Now, imagine a lit candle in front of you.
- Slowly exhale to blow it out.
- Repeat for four breath cycles.
Here’s the variation of the breathing prompt my son used.
- Close your eyes.
- Imagine a plateful of fresh baked, warm cookies right in front of you.
- Slowly inhale as if you’re savoring the scent of these delicious cookies.
- Pause.
- Now imagine a giant birthday cake topped with lit candles in front of you.
- Slowly exhale to blow out each of the candles one by one.
- Repeat for four breath cycle.
Importance of a Breathing Prompt To Help Kids Calm Down
This is a simple breathing prompt, which people crave. On social media forums, like Reddit, we often see requests for ELI5, which means “explain it like I’m five.” This is the perfect example of an effective way to explain slow breathing to a five-year-old. In fact, the children in the study learned to do it as they were practicing, revealing that you don’t have to be an expert to learn to use your breath to downregulate your nervous system.
Deep breathing, particularly with this simple technique, works at any age, and this study proved it. The average age of study participants was seven. The researchers measured heart rate and respiratory sinus arrhythmia, indicating activation of the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for rest-and-digest functions and counters fight-or-flight functions.
This is an easy, quick breathing prompt anyone can use. The methodology involved just four breath cycles over the course of one minute.
The research was conducted in natural settings, like playgrounds and museums, not a laboratory. This means we can use this breathing prompt no matter where we are or what we’re doing.
This technique employs a visualization almost everyone can relate to. The acts of smelling a flower and blowing out a candle are almost universal, and therefore something that’s easy for all of us to tap into.
I’ve talked about the fact that our brains can really concentrate on just one thing at a time, known as selective attention. When we’re focusing on the visualization of the breathing prompt, it makes it harder for intrusive thoughts to sneak in. For more information on selective attention, read this.
I particularly appreciate that the researchers shared their animated video so anyone can use it. Here’s a link to the video so you can use it with your kids (or for yourself!). In addition, here’s a nice summary of the study.
Small Changes, Big Transformation
Using this breathing prompt for just one minute is a small change we can make to help our kids build resilience. With small changes like these, wellness doesn’t have to feel so overwhelming. Give this practice a try this week and let me know how it goes!
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