Commitment to Calm day 25

Listening to music is correlated with better well-being and mood. Consider swapping music for TV to calm you down and enhance your mood.

Mommy needed a time out this morning. I wasn’t in a great mood and was definitely not calm when getting the kids out the door. Having already done cardio and yoga with breathing, I needed something else to lighten my mood. Enter: my Spotify playlist. After getting home, I listened to a few favorite songs and instantly felt my anxieties lifting. Music can shift a mood quickly and is an easy way to create calm.

A case of the Mondays

Today is Monday, which for some unknown reason means the kids have to relearn how to get themselves ready for school. What was a well-oiled machine on Friday, eating breakfast, putting on shoes, getting a snack, etc., is a mess today. We do this every week, so it shouldn’t surprise me. In fact, since starting my Commitment to Calm, I’ve been taking a much better approach to the mornings. I make a concerted effort to keep things in perspective and not yell. If I start repeating myself too much, there are consequences without emotions.

Most days, this works. Most days. Today was more difficult. In hindsight, I was really anxious about the new COVID variants on the news. I had just watched a report on the new recommendation for double masking. It stressed me out. Not only am I frustrated by the idea of getting the kids to wear double masks, I’m beginning to sense we will never truly be rid of COVID-19. It depresses me to realize this is not as temporary as I once hoped.

Music to the rescue

I know emotional clarity is important for curbing the effects of my emotions. After drop-off I had breakfast with Andrew and tried to define my moodiness. I labeled my emotions and discussed my concerns but still couldn’t shake my mood. I sat down at the desk to start writing. When I concentrate, I need silence or a chill instrumental background, but I put on a Spotify playlist instead. This one contains some eighties favorites like Fleetwood Mac, Tom Petty, and Bob Seger. I couldn’t concentrate on writing, but it did a lot to alleviate my mood, and quickly!

I often find music makes me feel better. There is a strong correlation in my household between the amount of music I listen to and my well-being. When I feel better, I listen to more music. When I listen to more music, I feel better. And round in circles we go.

The best dates involve music!

During quarantine, the decrease in driving equated to a decrease in music listening. Being stuck at home, the TV was frequently left on in the background. There’s a subtle stress in having an unattended TV polluting the environment. I had to remind myself to turn the TV off and play music instead. With music, agitation and stress from the TV are replaced with happiness and calm.

Singing along to music is calming as well. Recently I was driving the kids to their grandparents. We were discussing a topic that brings me anxiety. Just discussing it started to make my hands and feet sweat. My heartrate increased and I feared a panic attack was coming on. A five-minute drive suddenly felt like an eternity. I needed to calm myself so I turned to the radio. I turned up a favorite song and started singing along. Following along distracted me from my anxious thoughts, and singing out loud forced me to take deeper, longer breaths. The kids may have been embarrassed, but I felt better.

My mom is similar in her love of music. I remember being in high school after my parents’ divorce. Most mornings I would wake up to her belting out a song in the other room. She would be dancing around her room or walking on the treadmill, headphones on, singing along to her favorite songs. She received the benefits from the exercise, but also the music. Listening to her music was uplifting and mood-altering in a way that watching TV couldn’t be. It was the best way to start her day and got her through a really difficult time in life.

Music can heal the wounds which medicine cannot touch.

debasish mridha

There’s plenty of scientific research to back up these anecdotal examples. Participants of one study reported listening to music primarily to manage or regulate their moods.[1] In a study of older adults, listening to music generated positive emotions and was associated with well-being.[2] Music can help chronic pain sufferers as well. Another study revealed music helped chronic pain patients by distracting them from their pain and helping them relax. The data also showed a relationship between frequent music listening and a higher quality of life.[3] Music can do a lot for our mood.

You might be surprised how swapping even just a little bit of music listening instead of TV watching enhances your mood, calms you down, and makes you feel better. Give it a try in your house.

Leave me a comment and let me know how it goes!

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[1] Lonsdale, A.J. and North, A.C. (2011), Why do we listen to music? A uses and gratifications analysis. British Journal of Psychology, 102: 108-134. https://doi.org/10.1348/000712610X506831

[2] Laukka, P. Uses of music and psychological well-being among the elderly. J Happiness Stud 8, 215 (2007). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-006-9024-3

[3]   Mitchell, L. A., MacDonald, R. A. R., Knussen, C., & Serpell, M. G. (2007). A survey investigation of the effects of music listening on chronic pain. Psychology of Music, 35(1), 37–57. https://doi.org/10.1177/0305735607068887